The Last Few Days

The last day in Guangzhou was tough for me. I was so sad and I think the reasons behind it were many. I know a lot of adoptive parents are sad to leave their children’s birth country and I think that may have been part of it. I know that there is a certain sadness that comes with taking your children away from the only life they have ever known but in that respect that happened when we took Kingston out of the orphanage, a world away from the day-to-day lives of people in Beijing and Guangzhou. I think my sadness had to do with #1) We were leaving my “safe place.” I had no sadness upon leaving Beijing. We had been looking forward to leaving Beijing. Guangzhou was sunny, beautiful and warm. It had a pool for the kids to play in. We were as relaxed as one can be adopting a new child into our lives. I know that in parts of this blog I made this trip seem easy breezy. Adoption, even under the most ideal circumstances (which we had), is not at all easy. It was extremely hard. It was difficult for me to know that we were altering the happy family existence that we had for the unknown. We were taken out of a comfort level that was difficult for us to achieve as a family of three before we had potentially been ready to do so. Guangzhou put those difficulties and reservations on the back burner because it offered us a place to regroup from Beijing. It allowed us to put our defenses down and to take a breath. We were able to cross the street without completely fearing for our lives and the lives of our children. It allowed us to let our children run free just a little bit and play like children should be able to do. For me, Guangzhou will always hold a special place in my heart because it allowed me start to love Kingston and it allowed me to regain a level of patience with Everest. #2) I was extremely sad to say goodbye to our friends that we had grown so close to. After meeting Nancy, Tom, Betty and Eli in Beijing it was hard to say goodbye in Guangzhou. I couldn’t stop crying as it signified the end of our trip for me. Our friends were also our “safe place.” With them we were able to laugh and sometimes laughing is hard to come by when you are in China adopting a child. They just got it. It is hard to find people as good as they are. They were patient with us and they were patient with Everest. I know that we will remain close to them and we are looking forward to meeting the rest of their families in the hopefully near future. #3) Our adoption trip was done. We came, we saw, we did and we were leaving. And we were leaving with a child. We had faced the unknown and we persevered and we were moving on to face more unknowns. We will likely not adopt again. I know that we said that before and I will never say never but adoption at this point is extremely unlikely.

On our last day in Guangzhou, we woke up and had a relaxing breakfast with our friends. Kingston slept 15 hours so it was just Everest and I at breakfast. Everest has become a big boy who I actually allowed out of my sight to hit the buffet line on numerous occasions so that I could drink my coffee in relative peace. Our last day in Guangzhou was spent at a department store as it was raining. It was a tad bit of a sensory overload as is most experiences in China. We had to pick up toys and food for the trip home and as it was raining, what else is one going to do in China? We arrived back at the hotel to find out that we could board an earlier train so it was off to a quick McDonald’s lunch with our friends.

Getting the four of us checked out of the hotel was something of a fiasco. When we were just about packed up I asked Kingston if he had to “ney-neyo” knowing that he uses neyo-neyo interchangeably for #1 and #2. He looked right up at me and pushed some right on out. Great. So I started to change him and for some reason this time it made me dry heave. I was gagging and just about puking. Everest had never seen someone puke besides Kingston’s projectile vomit when we got him. He started bawling. I think he thought I was hurt. I was. That poop physically pained me. Two minutes after changing him, luggage in the doorway and he does it again. We can’t get out of the room because the kid kept pooping. We made it out of the room and checked out. The tears started as we were checking out. The receptionist asked if I was ok. Ryan told her that I was just so happy to be a Marriott Rewards Club member. We said our goodbyes. They were not fun for me as previously mentioned. We boarded our bus and waited at the train station for Kingston’s visa so that we could enter Hong Kong. We got on the later train so that all of us could sit together. We were traveling with another family and we made the two hour trek to HK. It was a long day for everybody. We arrived in HK around 7:00. Around 6:00 we thought we were there, packed up all of the kids’ toys, put Kingston in his carrier (not an easy task) and headed to the door. Someone who spoke English told us after the fact that we didn’t arrive until 7:00 so back we went. About halfway to HK we all realized we did not know where our hotel was in reference to the train station. After the two plus weeks we’d been through simple things had been forgotten and all rationality and common sense was long gone. We did manage to remember after a few minutes that we believed our hotel to be close to the train station. Luckily enough it was attached to the station. Oh and in the middle of all of this Ryan realized it was our anniversary. When we got to the hotel we ended up upgrading our room. We paid a fortune for it but the receptionist made it seem like a good idea. At that point anything sounded good but I could have slept in a suitcase and been fine. I really wanted Ryan to see some of HK so we dragged the kids out in the rain and found a restaurant. Everybody was exhausted but we managed to get a cab down to I don’t know where and found an Italian place. I went to the bathroom and a cook walked out without washing her hands. I ate anyway. I was too tired to complain. It was delicious. The kids ate like champs. It felt so good to be one step closer to home and to familiar food that wasn’t McDonalds.

We got up at the crack of dawn after only a few hours of sleep and off we went. As we waited for the hotel shuttle one of the hotel workers were trying to get Everest off of the floor. I freaked out at them and after a few attempts to make Everest get up they left us alone. I think I looked deranged and you would have thought they would have taken one look at me and decided it would have been in their best interest to leave us alone. They did not.

At the airport we had more pooping issues. Twice for KT and once for Everest. I don’t know what all happened but at one point while I was spending the last of our HK dollars I came back and Ryan frantically said he needed money. I asked why and he replied that he needed to tip the janitor for wiping Everest’s ass. I handed him the rest of our HK dollars. About $7 in US. Usually I feel like Everest should pay us to wipe his butt so it was the least I could do for a complete stranger.

The airplane ride wasn’t too atrocious. It was the best it could be for 14 hours with two kids, which is not good and was not fun but we got through it. I am glad it is over. Then we followed the fun of the plane ride with a three hour bus ride. Good times. Danielle met us at Memorial Union and brought us home. Kingston wasn’t sure what to make out of the place and definitely was not sure what to make out of the cat. He is warming up to both. He finds it funny that the cat’s food is on the floor. At least I think he does because he calls me over to look at it, says, “Meow” and giggles.

Kingston was not a fan of his new bedroom and crawled in with Everest. After about 15 minutes of laughing, both kids were asleep. We managed to stay awake for pizza and then we were asleep as well.

Today is a new day. Kingston tried cereal for the first time. What kid isn’t going to like Lucky Charms?!? He is busy exploring his new house and surroundings. Not much to explore given our lack of furniture. All is well for the most part. Will we have difficulties? Yes. Will our children struggle with having lived in an institution for a portion of their childhood, yes, but do all kids struggle with something?

I don’t look at them and see challenge. I look at them and see unlimited potential. I look at how far Everest has come in two years time. I look at how far Everest has come in just 6 months time. Right now Kingston is chasing a remote control car and squealing. He has potential.

I can’t believe I have kids. The fact that it is plural is outrageous to me. How did I get to where I am today? How did this all happen so quickly? I look at my children and I know that miracles do happen. I look at them and know that God exists. I look at them and see the innocence that is too soon lost. I look at them and see hope, faith and goodness. I look at them and I know that Ryan and I made the right choices. Although our family is not a conventional family, our family is just that, our family. Although their eyes are not ours and you cannot see the resemblance of us in their smiles, you will see Ryan and me in their personalities. You will see us in their manners. You will see us in their morals. You will see us. They may not be from us but they are part of us nonetheless. My children are my joy, my inspiration and my future. They are Everest and Kingston Lentz.