Anniversaries

The fall is an emotional time for us.  We had our first "family day" for Kingston on Oct. 26th, which marked our first time meeting our youngest.  We just today celebrated (a day early) Everest's family day, which marked his third year since joining our family.  We also have our 9th wedding anniversary on the 8th, quickly followed by Kingston's 4th birthday on the 12th.  It's a busy time for us but it is a good time.  We have a lot of feelings around this time of year as little moments in time remind us of China and I know that if Ryan and I have these feelings, our boys must too. 

I am drawing this blog to a close for now.  I will likely stop in every now and again or maybe I will start something new but as this was Kingston's homecoming blog and Kingston is home, I will close it.

We are happy, we are healthy, we are lucky and we are blessed beyond measure.  We have family who loves us and friends who support us.  I look back on the past three plus years of our lives and realize what a completely wild ride it has been.  I am struck by how strong we are and how far we have come. We have two boys that bring me laughter each day.  They fulfill my life as I never thought possible.  Their very being makes me thankful.  Our lives only started the day three years ago that Everest joined our family and given that, we are still infants, learning how to live each day the best we can.

I want to thank everybody who has followed our journey, who has understood our struggles, who has laughed at our stories.  I want to thank our families who have stood by us through all of our turmoil and have offered support through just being there.  I want to thank our friends who have been with us every step of the way and who never judged our decisions no matter how non-traditional they may have been.  It is through these struggles that you realize who matters in your life.

Mr. Everest Chang Chunhui Lentz and Mr. Kingston Zhang Tao Lentz do not yet realize how fortunate they are to have such wonderful people in their lives but then again, perhaps they already do.

Love to you all,
Melissa, Ryan, Everest and Kingston

Please keep in touch:  mlentz04@yahoo.com

    Our first family picture 

                                                Our first photo of Everest

                                         Our first family picture with Kingston

                                                               Brothers

                                                     Growth beyond measure

                                                       Becoming Kingston

In a Moment

I read someone’s blog post today where they were talking about the first time they saw their children in person and I realized that I never really talked much about it.  How looking back I realize how profound both moments were.

On Everest Day we were told our meeting would be delayed a bit.  Not good news for overly anxious parents.  We went to the grocery store and came back quickly because we did not want to miss anything.  We sat at the window.  Ryan saw him first.  A little boy holding a stuffed dog.  The stuffed dog we now we refer to as China Doggie.  What I remember feeling was somewhat of a cross between sheer exhilaration, raw emotion and overwhelming panic.  It gives me chills to think about now.  Your heart feels like it will go through your throat.  He looked so small and vulnerable.  We received a call and headed down to meet him.  He warmed to us right away.  He was full of smiles and we were awed by this child who readily called us momma and bobba.  He was this little bundle of energy and cuteness and he scared us.  He scared the shit out of us.  He was ours and we were his.  No turning back.  Our lives were changed in the blink of an eye.  I can picture the sparkle in his eye and the smirk of his lips like it was yesterday.

Now meeting Kingston was a completely different experience and I am happy that it didn’t take place at the hotel.  I am glad that they met us in different locations so that their experiences didn’t have to be shared.  So much of their lives are shared already.  We rode to the orphanage mostly in silence.  What we were doing seemed so huge not only because we were about to meet our second son, but also because of the little man already in the van with us.  An only son about to get a brother.  He was ecstatic.  I remember holding Ryan’s hand.  I remember tearing up at how huge it all was because we were seeing where Everest spent the first years of his life and we were picking up Kingston there.  It was like coming full circle.  We went into a conference room and were there for a few moments before I turned around and there he was.  A little wisp of a boy who looked at me with his big, sad eyes.  I can picture the huge tears in his eyes and the biting of his lower lip like it was yesterday.  I remember feeling instantly drawn to this little creature because he seemed so needy.  He needed a mom, a dad, a brother and a sandwich. 

You are so in the moment at the time that you can’t sit back and ponder the profound monumental event taking place.  It is only after that you can hope to remember the small details. 

NYC and Home Again

I'm home.  After a long week of waaaay too much food and alcohol and I am back.  I am on a self-prescribed detox.  If I lived in NY I would be a fat alcholic with insomnia.  Apparently nobody in NY goes to bed before 12 AM and apparently they don't get into work too early either.  That is the case it seems if you live there.  If you are there for work from out of town, you start work at your normal time.  This leads to exhaustion.  I am worn out.

I had a great time though.  Ryan and I started the trip bright and early last Friday and we arrived in NY around 10:30 am.  We headed straight to our hotel and dropped off our luggage and just started to walk.  And walk and walk and walk and walk.  Again, New Yorkers seem to do a lot of this.  My feet and legs hurt like they have never hurt before.  Flip flops were perhaps not the smartest shoewear choice but it was way too hot for anything else.  NY has heat beyond heat with all of the pavement and people. 

Our hotel was quite the trendy, hipster spot to stay.  The Standard was not standard in any sense although the rooms could have been a bit more swanky for the price you pay to stay there.  I guess they used up the budget on the rest of the common areas.  The guest rooms had what they call, "peekaboo showers."  Yes, that's right folks, no doors on the showers.  Hilarious.  Glad we were not staying with the kids, that would have scarred them for life.  I watched the morning news while showering.  Kind of like multi-tasking.

We ate fabuously.  On Sunday night we went to Buddakan and it was oppulent dining at its best.  When in NY do as New Yorkers do.  Let's pay an unseemly amount of money on dinner and drinks.  The atmosphere and food was amazing though.  Well worth the price.  Unreal. 

We explored a lot.  Soho, Little Italy, Lower Manhattan, Upper West Side, Lower East Side...we hit them all.  My feet are mad.  I think my favorite part was just being with Ryan.  We needed it.

Monday came way too soon for us as Ryan headed out that night.  I was so unbelievably sad.  However, in a few hours, Trish, my manager, took his place and everybody else filtered in throughout the next day so I was not lonely in the big city for long.  We went to the yarn show and met with mills and vendors and then headed out for drinks and appetizers.  We ended the night on a boat on the Hudson River drinking Coronas.  I was one of the less hung-over people the next morning.  Each morning and night repeated itself.  Rewind repeat, rewind repeat, rewind repeat.  Hence the exhaustion.

It was awesome to see the kids.  KT is potty trained.  He dropped his drawers to show me his new Toy Story undies when I walked in the door.  It is AWESOME!!  I am so proud of him.  He got fully dressed this morning before he came into my room.  Granny Margy is the child whisperer.  She has those kids trained.  Now Ryan and I just have to try not to mess it up.  KT likes his momma to take care of everything so it's a hard habbit for the little rabbit to break but I think he is off to a great start this morning.  Let's hope it is retained.  If not, maybe Ryan and I will head off to Hawaii for a couple of weeks.....

Rule #1: no hitting. Rule #2: no spitting Rule #3: no whining

I think I’m fully-recovered from yesterday’s rant.  It was cathartic.  I am actually witty and smiling at work today.  SHOCKING, I know.

The kids were wonderful today in getting ready.  There was minimal stalling and minimal whining.  Again, SHOCKING, I know.  Kingston even got out my sandals for me.  In response I started stomping my feet, hitting the wall and yelling, “BUT YOU NEED TO HELP MOMMA.  I CAAAAAN’T PUT ON MY SANDALS.  UGH UGH UGH.  I CAAAAAAAN’T.  HELP MEEEEEEE NOW!!!!!!!”  Kingston stopped laughing long enough to look at me and simply say, “Momma you whining!” 

My Rants - I apologize in advance

Dear first born,

Why must you thwart my efforts at getting us out of the house early?  We were so close today.  We were at the shoe putting on point in the routine, when all of a sudden I hear the familiar bellow of, “MOOO-OOOOM I GOTTA GO POOOO-OOOOP.”  Son, you are not an in-and-out-get-um-done sort of boy.  You are a lackadaisical pooper.  I have always known it was a matter of time before books started to accompany you into the potty and last week it happened.  Now we are going to be officially unable to remove your booty from the toilet seat.  Regardless of my encouraging, “Everest, let’s get a move on, squeeze those suckers out,” you sit and sit and sit and sit.

Dear daycare lady,

Don’t you realize that I am in a hurry in the morning?  Why must you thwart my efforts of getting to work on time now that we are not early from above mentioned son’s pooping?  You tell me that my youngest son didn’t get to go to swimming lessons, yes swimming lessons THAT WE PAID FOR, because we wrapped up his owie.  For your information, the owie was wrapped up in Coban wrap, which is what we use for swimming.  By the way, I told the other teacher that he could go in the water with it on.  Oh, you didn’t know that?!?  Why must you admit that to me?  That just shows that there is NO COMMUNICATION going on there.  Oh, but he had fun playing with all of the toys there?  That’s nice.  Did I mention that WE PAID FOR SWIMMING LESSONS NOT TOY PLAYING?!?  Yeah, we did.

By the way, how about trying to teach my boy some ABCs or 123s?  I know that you are just trying to get through the day while dealing with maniacal children, same as the rest of us parents.  But unlike parents, YOU GET PAID FOR IT!!!!!!!

Dear slow driver,

Why must you actually make me late for work?  I realize that you are as old as dirt and probably can’t see but the speed limit says 55, which means you go at least 60.  NOT 43!!!!  Oh, you don’t know where you are going?  GET A MAP.  Or if you are technically savvy, which you are apparently not since you can’t drive your car, there is this thing called a GPS.  Oh, you were in the 3^rd Infantry?  You know how I know that?  You were driving so slow that I had a lot of time to study your license plate.  Thanks for serving our country now how about serving me and getting off the damn road.

Happy 4th of July

I’m back again. 

I know that at least my dad still reads this.  He told me last night.  So I’m back again.  Even though he knows 99% of my stories before I write them.

We had a HOT 4^th of July like so many others in the midwest.  We started the day by crashing our neighborhood association picnic.  It would have been great to hang out there longer if
A) it wasn’t 200 degrees in the shade.

B) they had alcoholic beverages.

So given that these two things didn’t work to our advantage, we didn’t stay long.  Plus, we never paid our neighborhood association dues.  We took off before we were found out.  I can hear them whispering right now, “Those Lentz’s…they never paid their $20….Those kids?!?  I can hear those two kids screaming down the block….And the parent’s?!?  I would hardly call them parents…More like white trash babysitters.  Did you see them in their front yard drinking as the kids rode their bikes?  And was that music coming out of their garage?  I mean, what is this the trailer park?  We just don’t get those kinds around here.”

Then we went to the pool where we continued to class it up.  On my watch Mr. Kingston kept on running back to our chairs and I caught a glimpse of him holding his wenus (ha, like the term?!?).  I thought, oh boy, he is going to want to potty on the GRA (see subsequent post).  I asked him if he had to potty and he said yes.  After quickly putting on my shoes (I should mention that he didn’t have a diaper on at this point – it had already exploded) I picked him up and we made it about 3 steps before I felt a bit of warmth and then a lot of warmth cascading down the side of me.  THE KID PEED ON ME.  I washed myself off in the pool  - thanks for the chlorine bath Middleton Pool – and we left.  We marked our territory, thank you and goodbye.

The next day (it should be illegal to have to work the day after the 4^th) I dropped KT off at daycare and the teacher told me, “Oh my goodness, little Mr. Kingston is doing such a good job at pottying in the toilet.” 

Thank you and goodbye.

Summertime Part Two

Can I just say how much I love summer?  How I wish the winter months existed only to give me a couple of snow days off from work?  Summer is just EASY.  No coats to put on, no mittens to get lost, no boots to track in snow.  Clothing is EASY - here kid put on your swimmers.  They kinda look like shorts and you don't need your under grunders.  Summer is so easy that we keep on forgetting to bring Kingston's diapers with us to the beach.  His diapers get so full of water and expand so much that they explode and deposit the white inards wherever he plants his bottom, which is ok because unfortunately (or fortunately depending on how you look at it) Kingston has taken a liking to peeing outside on the grass.  He says, "I wanna potty in the GRA (note no S sound)."  He says this loud. and gets louder if you do not answer to his piss whim right away.  He will not be deterred.  It makes me giggle.  So yesterday at the state park I had to take him behind some cars so he could pee.  He does a good job and gets a total kick out of himself.  However, he started to bend over so that he could poop too and I draw the line at pooping outside.  He may act like one sometimes but he is not a bear.  Everest told Kingston he was going to call the police on him since he was peeing outside and then proceeded to ask if he too could pee outside.  The sheriff shall be visiting us at any point I am to assume.  The only problem I see with this whole scenario (besides older calling the cops on the younger, which is something that could feasibly happen in the future) is that now Kingston wants to whip out his wee to pee on things besides the GRA.  Yesterday he wanted to pee in the bath and then walked his little nakedness over to the shower and pretended to pee on the door.  He didn't but it is just a matter of time as he thinks he is quite witty while doing these shenanigans.  Ah but I digress.  I love summer.  The past two weekends were filled with exploring Madison and the surrounding area finding lakes and state parks for the boys to play in.  Today we are heading to the pool before going to my friend's daughter's birthday party, where there will be more water.  The heat is so crazy that it is the only thing to do.  Oh darn, let's go swimming again.  Ahhh, with swimming comes ice cold margaritas.  No wonder I love the summer months.  Talk to you later, gotta go pee in the GRA.

Summertime

Hello again!

I’ve been really bad at blogging.  I thought I’d make a go of it for a bit and then life got in the way again.  It has a tendency to do that.  I am going to try one more time to keep up the blog and if I can’t then I am going to put it to bed.  As a follower of a few mommy blogs now I am ultra disappointed and feel it a personal slight when someone I don’t even know doesn’t update their blog on a regular basis so in light of trying not to do that to whoever may be still out there I will either keep this going regularly (every two weeks) or I’ll say my goodbyes as I retire from blogging.

The summer is in full swing in Madison, however, it doesn’t feel too much like summer because I am missing the familiarity of our summers in Whitefish Bay.  I miss having our friends over for drinks and dinner in the backyard.  I miss the quick walks up to the water fountains for Everest to play.  I miss the way it felt.  But in time I will establish new traditions and new feelings and I’ll look forward to summers in Madison rather than missing summers in Whitefish Bay. 

Kingston’s language is progressing very well.  I think he will at some point require some speech therapy but we are not too concerned at this point because everything is just so new still.  He is working on saying Everest instead of Eva.  He is trying to get the “st” sound down.  Instead of “st” he does a “ta”  so every time before he tries to say Everest’s name he says, “ta, ta ta, Evata.”  At least we are up to three syllables. 

Everest is doing amazing.  We had a rough spot for a bit where we were coming out of the honeymoon phase of being home with Kingston but it seems like things have leveled out for now.  He is back to his charming effervescent self.  He is making us laugh again and I have even heard his laugh (my favorite sound in the world).

Funny stuff:

Everest referring to people’s cabins as their cabinets.  He likes cabinets.

Everest referring to sky scrapers as scrape towers.  He also likes scrape towers.

Have you ever read the books, “If you give a moose a muffin” or “If you give a cat a cupcake?”  They are sort of cute but sort of make me want to shoot myself.  Anyway, if you have read them you will get this.  Ryan opened a beer the other day and it was slippery as he went to pick it up off of the counter.  It ends up slipping out of his hands and spiraling on the floor spraying beer everywhere.  Everest says, “If you give a daddy a beer he’s going to drop it and if he drops it he is going to get another one.”

Scary stuff ending with a funny stuff:

We had quite the scare on Friday.  Ryan took the day off of work and I was working from home in the morning (had a half day in the afternoon).  Ryan got up early to work on the playset in the backyard and was out there for about a half an hour before he came inside from getting stung multiple times by bees.  Within minutes he was starting to develop a burning, itching rash all over his body.  Within ten minutes he was out the door to urgent care.  Within a half an hour I got a call saying he was being taken by ambulance to the hospital after suffering from anaphylaxis from multiple bee stings.  It was a scary scene at the hospital but he was talking and was ok.  They wanted him to spend the night because of fear of “rebounding” but we were able to leave around 6:30.  I picked Everest up for school and he was somewhat annoyed that his playset was not put together yet.  I told him that he should be more concerned about his dad and not worried about his playset and that he shouldn’t talk to me for a while.  After about five minutes (apparently enough time in his mind of being quiet) he said to me, “Mommy, I am really con-corned about daddy.”  So he may not have been concerned but at least he was con-corned.  Happy, happy, happy and relieved that Ryan is ok.  He now has to carry an epi-pen with him wherever he goes and he is going to start bee desensitization through an allergist. 

Kingston, while improving on the language front, has become quite a beast in the behavior area.  Whoa!  He’s been bad.  When he doesn’t get what he wants when he wants it (from me only) he will FREAK OUT.  Yelling, kicking, spitting.  His favorite to say during that time is, “MOMMA, YOU GO WAY (away)!!!!  MOMMA YOU TINKY (stinky)!!!!”  Charming little boy, right?!?  He is a real treasure during those times.  However, the last few days he has been AWESOME! 

The boys are loving being outside and playing with their pool, water guns, water balloons and hoses.  They are completely enamored with the kids next door.  When the girls are around our boys want nothing to do with us.  It’s kind of sad but also kind of AWESOME.  Last night the kids were in the house long enough to get their swimmers on before heading out for two hours to the next door neighbor’s house.  I did not get asked to give an underdog once!  In fact, when I tried to, Kingston said he wanted one from the neighbor girl.  Again, AWESOME.  I went inside and poured another glass of wine.  In just rereading this paragraph, I realized that saying my child wanted an underdog from the girl next door sounded really naughty.  Thatta boy!

Back in the Blogging Saddle Again

You know you're in trouble if your husband asks if you brushed your teeth in the same voice he uses when he asks your boys if they brushed their teeth.  The next question is obviously, why is your husband asking if you brushed your teeth?

You know you've found your soul mate when you tell your husband that your brilliant idea is to bring wine to the school fun fair in a travel mug and he replies that you probably shouldn't.  Not because he thinks it is wrong, because he thinks you'll spill it.  And he's right, you probably will.

You know that your children are amazing when they do something that is so beyond their years that it literally takes your breath away. 

Back to the trouble part. 

You know you're in trouble when you are too tired to get up in the morning so you don't shower.  Instead you just put your hair in a ponytail.  Only your hair is too short for a ponytail.  It looks really sad.  You put on a skirt to compensate for your greasy hair.  You go to put on your shoes (heels to further compensate) and you realize that you haven't shaved your legs in at least a week (or two...).  You toss all care aside and go to work, skirt and all.  And that's the hotness folks.

In other news...we've come to realize that Kingston thinks that Ronald McDonald is the same man who owns the farm.  Whenever we say, "Wanna go to McDonalds?" Kingston will sing, "EIEIO."  That is not the amazing beyond their years stuff that I'm talking about. 

All of a sudden Everest can not only ride a two wheel bike but shit, he can also read.  I guess that is what school does for a kid.  When did this big boy stuff happen.  Oh, I know, it was while I was drinking wine from the travel coffee mug.

                                                     Some from the archives

Makeshift  Belt

The Neglected Son

I Heart China

Drink Dichotomy



Makin' Momma Proud

Precarious Times

Apparently I still have readers out there.

It is hard to believe but lately I’ve been at a loss for words. I’ve just been struggling lately. Our whole little family seems to be struggling quite a bit. And for the first time in a long time I don’t want to share it. I think that as the kids get older that sharing their stories will get harder because their stories become theirs to tell. Part of what people like about my blog is my honesty so when I am not able to be honest I have a hard time writing my blog. I guess I will have to be cautiously vague in some respects for the protection of my boys.

There are behavioral issues and they are just coming to light right now. I don’t know if it is a delayed reaction to all of the “trauma” our family has been through in the past few months or something else. I have no way of knowing because no one is talking. But it scares me. We have this picture perfect family that isn’t so picture perfect. And although no one is perfect, I’d like to think that we could at least tackle the being happy part of life. But alas, life doesn’t always have a cherry on top. However, when you are a kid it should. I feel bad. I feel sad. I feel helpless and sometimes hopeless. I need to remind myself that we are all still learning. Learning and making mistakes. It’s rough. It is so hard right now. I wish I could make all of the bad stuff go away. I want to whisk away hardship for my boys and never have sadness touch their minds, never have tears on their cheeks or hear distress in their voice. But I am only a mom and moms can only do so much. There are inner demons that moms cannot conquer for their children. There are traumas that are not only skin deep but touch the core and moms are sometimes no match for that. But how does a kid work through that? Why does a kid have to? Kids are resilient but they are resilient up until a point and at what point do they get broken for good. What happens when their batteries run out? I don’t want to lose the innocence that I know will someday be lost. How do I hold onto that as long as possible? How do they hold onto it?

I ache for my boys. I understand it now when my mom says, when you hurt, I hurt. When you are sad, I am sad. A mother’s life is so entwined in their children that emotions become one. I wish I could inverse it so that my boys could feel what I feel instead. That way they would see how spectacular they are – how smart, how funny, how beautiful inside and out.

Home

I cannot believe that I haven't posted in over a month. That's crazy. I guess it shows how busy we've been and how tired I am at the end of the day. We just got back tonight from Florida. We had a wonderful time. I have a bout of strep throat yet again but other than that it really went well. Kingston and Everest were wonderful. They couldn't get enough of the warm weather and of course the beach and pool. Everest can swim unattended now. I still fear he will drown because he thinks he is Michael Phelps and he is more like half-drowing rat. Kingston has absolutely no fear of the water and luckily the water was heated so he didn't freeze as he did in Guangzhou. Building sand castles was a hit at the beach, as well as jumping over waves. Kingston had a thing with dumping sand over his head. We are still picking sand out of his hair. Kid is strange. Ryan and I had a night out in Naples and had a wonderful time, feeling very fancy as we spent way too much on dinner and drinks. Unfortunately you'd have to go to McDonald's or Subway to get a meal in Naples at an affordable rate. So fancy we were. Speaking of McDonalds, every time we say it Kingston says, "EIEIEIO." His langauge exploded this past week. He is speaking in three word sentences and he is getting easier to understand. I am really glad to have had this trip to FL to bond with Kingston. I felt like I didn't really get the chance in that we got home from China, I got sick and then I headed back to work. In Florida we all got to relax as a family. It was really good for us and now it is basically back to reality for the Lentz's. We had a full day of travel today and the kids are cranky. I don't blame them. I would be cranky too. Actually, I kind of am.

Jazz Hands

So we've known for awhile that Everest enjoys all things art, music and dance so it is about time we get him started in something but hey, we've been a bit busy here. Yesterday was Everest's first jazz class. Everest and eight little girls in black tutus partook in an hour of "dance." Some of the girls had been in ballet before and I am proud to say my little jazz hands did better than they did! We had a busy day yesterday. We did jazz class and then met my friend Danielle and her two girls at the Overature Center downtown where every Saturday they have a free hour show for kids. This week's show was a juggler and the kids were mesmerized. Even Kingston sat still (relatively). We then headed to the Nitty Gritty for lunch and the kids were entertained by playing video games. Kingston sat with the "Buck Shooter" rifle in his hands for about a half an hour pretending to shoot. Whatever, works for me. Everest fell asleep by 5:30 and Kingston was down shortly after. Awesome.

Today we played in the snow and then KT and I went to the grocery store and Everest and Daddy went sledding. Apparently Ryan has named Everest, "King Sledder." He just walked in with rosy cheeks, which I suppose is a trait of those called King Sledder. Kingston, on the other hand, was the King of Trader Joes as everybody who walked by him had to chat with him. I even had a lady grab his ears and say she loved them. A tad inappropriate but she was nice.

I went to the ENT on Friday who suggested I take my tonils out. Queen of Strep.

Nothing New

I think it's Ground Hog's Day as I have strep throat again. Actually, I am not sure that it went away the last time. I skipped one dose of meds and it is back with a vengence. We have figured out the culprit, one Mr. Kingston Tao is infecting his mother. Apparently young Kingston is a strep carrier. Kingston is on antibiotics but I am not holding out a lot of help that he is being "treated" by it. I guess we are off to an ENT, hopefully tomorrow, because I can't keep on doing this to my body. I am so worn down. I am hoping that tonsilectomies are not in our future but it isn't looking so good.

The kids are doing well. I am glad it is me so is getting sick and not them. KT's speech, while quite incoherent still, is much better as he is at least making an effort. He has realized our annoyance at him constantly saying, "You top it right now!" and has toned that down along with the "No's." We are all appreciative of this. He is a jolly fellow when he is not pissed off at one of us. Ryan is taking him to be evaluated by a speech pathology team through the school district tomorrow. I am looking forward to hearing their report.

Other than that there isn't too much new. Like I said, Ground Hog's Day.

Sick Again

I’m sick again.

Strep throat x 3 or 4. Not sure how many times anymore.

I know when it is coming now. I can feel it seeping in about a week before I get the sore throat and white spots. I start to get incredibly fatigued to where I don’t even want to leave the house. I don’t have the energy to do anything. It makes me feel so sad and guilty that I can’t be more interactive with the boys but I honestly can’t do it. I don’t want this to be my new normal but I haven’t felt great since getting back from China. Even on my “non-strep” days I have minimal energy.

The kids are doing well. They are happy for the most part. They bicker, they scream and then they will play nice for a half a second. It is tiring as if strep throat wasn’t exhausting enough. Yesterday Everest said, “Mom are you just going to go nuts today?” Yes, I thought.

Work is work. Again, hard to have energy to get up and go to work these days. Took half a vacation day on Friday because I was so out of it.

Ryan asked me if I thought I was depressed. I’m not. I want to feel good and happy but my body won’t let me.

Heading to the doc today for more antibiotics. Wondering if the tonsils will need to come out. At this point I almost want them to.

I do need a break, there’s no doubt. A Ryan and me break. To get to normal or an attempted normal for a night or two. Not sure KT will let that happen. Wherever I go, KT is sure to follow. I honestly konk him on the head getting pots or pans out of the cupboard or milk out of the fridge because my human shadow is right behind me. “Moommmma, mommmmaaa, mooommma.”

Conversations

Hilariousness.

Life is better. The last few days have been, shall I even dare to say it?!?, Fun!

I think it helps having a house-husband. Ryan is down to working 40% of his hours. Bad on the bank account but good for the organization of our lives.

Everest and Kingston are seated at dinner when I roll in from work. Everybody is happy to see mom. I sit, they eat, all is well. We get up in the morning and everybody gets dressed in an orderly fashion and we don't have to rush because Ryan is taking Kingston to daycare after Everest gets on the bus. Usually Kingston and I leave early and then Ryan stays at home until after Everest leaves. Kind of nice to be able to somewhat relax (both us and the kids) in the mornings.

Last night I helped Everest with his homework and Kingston sat on my lap. Kids were in bed by 8:15 and Ryan and I were able to sit for awhile and talk. Nice. Financially unsustainable but nice.

And on to the funny....

On Sunday we were in downtown Madison and we were stopped at a stoplight. A Madison cop pulled up next to us. Everest, spying that the cop's window was open, unrolled his window and the following conversation ensued:

Everest: Excuse me but why do you have a computer in your car? Does it help you catch the cars that are going to fast?

Cop: Yes, that's right.

Everest: Why do you have a computer AND a camera in your car?

Cop: Well both of them help me do my job.

Mom and Dad in front seat seriously cracking up as the light turns green: Everest, the light is green say goodbye.

Everest: Goodbye, have a great day.

Cop: You too.


Last night I was putting Everest to bed, knowing that he would seriously crash if he would just stop talking for a second. He wouldn't. He is a bit obsessed at times with trying to spell, which is great but not at bedtime when he should be obsessed with sleeping. So every other minute he thinks of another word that he can "spell." Finally I said, "Everest you need to go to sleep. S-L-E-E-P!" To which Everest responds, "O-K M-O-M!!"


Today Ryan picked up Everest from school. In the midst of something or other Everest says what sounds like, "Holy Shit!!" Ryan says, "EVEREST WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?!?" Ryan and I aren't in the habit of saying holy shit. Anyway, Everest says, "I said, Holy Shik." Ryan says, "Everest I still don't like that language." Everest responds, "But Dad, it's not like I said Shit, S-H-I-T. I said, Shik, S-H-I-K!" Kid can't spell his last name but damn can that kid spell Shit. Shit.

Tonight we put the kids to bed on the floor of our room because we felt a tad lazy and Everest thought he was going to stay up "late." Everest says, "Can someone do something for me....because I am trying to concentrate on sleeping? I say, "Yes, of course. What do you need?" Everest answers, "I think that the two of you and daddy need to be quiet because I don't want to tell you to shhhhh. Well I am going to just tell you to shshshsh." And he immediately falls asleep.


I wish I had more funny with KT but the poor kid can't talk yet. He is learning a bit more each week. He is starting to imitate more and more and I think he'll be a crack up when we can communicate. He makes us laugh nonetheless. Kid can seriously shake his booty, says, "noyoutopit" continuously (translation, "no, you stop it.") and is doing great with the potty training. Caught him on his mini-toilet by himself today. He peed a bit on his socks and then proceeded to empty his mini toilet into the big toilet without spilling his entire pot of pee onto our bathroom floor. Progress folks, progress.


We made paella today. It tastes professional. I'm pretty proud of myself. The kids seriously need to be on top of us when we're in the kitchen if they are not eating themselves. I had to pull up two chairs behind us for the two of them to sit on. They were completely entertained watching us and listening to music for almost 45 min and then the silly started, which is kind of scary by a hot stove. But wow, to have someone just want to be so near you that they don't want to play, they just want to be in your presence. That's pretty powerful.

Well we're off to eat. I think Kingston is just about to sleep. He is about two feet from where we laid him down. Squirmy. Cute. He is gaining some weight in his cheeks. Loves beefsticks. Starting to like cheese. Welcome to WI skinny!

Another minute to another hour to another day

And that's how our days have been. I'm not going to lie. This whole ordeal has been challenging since we came home. We're tired, I've been sick three times and Kingston is bringing the terrible threes to a whole new level. It will seem like we've reached a plateau, an even playing field where everybody is going along in some sort of organized chaos (but organized nonetheless) and then we'll be brought back to reality. And reality hits hard. Really hard.

I feel like I'm all doom and gloom in my blog posts and that's mostly because when I write them it's at the end of the night when we've been through putting the kids to bed. An event that we dread from the moment we wake up in the morning. Like I said, it is just challenging. And we have to be up to the challenge because we have no choice in the matter. We signed up for this.

Tonight we asked Kingston where his toes were. We ask this a lot. We are hoping one day he points to something besides his head. Challenging.

Yesterday Everest told me he didn't like it when Kingston took his toys. Today Everest took what Kingston was playing with three times. Challenging (and really annoying to everybody).

We got the carpets cleaned the other week. Apparently the kids don't realize that this costs money because today Kingston spit toothpaste all over our bedroom floor. More than annoying.

Yesterday a little girl called Everest stinky because of his owies on his ankles. We were at the McDonald's playground. All the kids started calling him stinky. I wanted to think of a comeback for him but all I came up with was totally unacceptable to say to a child. I called Ryan after. He said I should have had him say, "Well I am perfect in every other way so shut up you shit cow."

Kingston has diaper rash bad. We are trying to keep diapers off of him while at home. He peed himself sitting at the dinner table. Awesome. Good stuff.

Then there are the things that make me laugh:

We were driving by a corn field today and Everest said, "Mom, that's where the corn on the cobs live."

On the way home Everest said, "You know mom...there are two types of butts. There is the type that is next to your wee wee that you poop out of. Then there is the type that is like, "Mom, but mom, but, but, I really want that. But moom, but, but, but..."

What is being said out loud right now, "Mom why does animals eat animals? I know, because they don't have real life food."

Today I said that perhaps I wasn't cut out to be a mother. But then I look at my two kids and I know that we must be doing something right.